By Jaci Garrett | C.S. Lewis once said, “Friendship is born at that moment when one man says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought that no one but myself…’”
Friendship seems such an arbitrary thing for us because we do not really put much thought into it. Have you ever met someone for the first time and somehow it felt as though you had known one another since birth? I tend to be of the belief that friendship was designed by God for us so that we always know there someone by our side.
Afterall, from the start of Genesis Chapter 1, we see that God created us for relationships. We see relationships with earth, animals, significant others, and I would argue, friends. I like to think that if Eve were close enough with Adam to offer him a bite of her fruit, that at least on some level, they had a friendship relationship.
Friendships can look like many different things; friends can be super close, an acquaintance, a sort of in between, or even someone we have not even met yet. As a kid I liked to imagine that Mr. Rogers and I were friends, all though we never actually met. Our friendships come in all shapes, sizes, combinations, and types. So why do we have friends? What are friends for?
It seems like a selfish question to ask what friends are for, but in defining that, it might actually help us to love our neighbors better. Jesus had friends. From scripture it seems like Jesus had twelve friends, but three super close friends.
Jesus took the twelve just about everywhere, but when a super important moment came up, like in Mark 9, Jesus went to be transfigured and only took Peter, John, and James with him. I bet there have been moments in your life like that. A moment that was so special or so intense that you just wanted to celebrate with your closest friends. From the story we encounter here in Mark, we see that God designed our minds like this for a reason, and that even Jesus needed his close group of confidants.
There was a television show back in the 90’s, perhaps you’ve seen it, it was called “Friends.” In this show, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, Joey, and Ross all try to navigate life together as adults in New York City. They experience heartbreak, love, tragedy, and triumph together. There is one episode that really touches me, more so than the others.
When Ross get’s back from London, after calling Emily Rachel, he is lost and heartbroken. All of his friends gather around him and try to comfort him in this difficult, though completely self-inflicted, time. Every single time I watch it, I am reminded of the time that my friends have stepped in to help me through a difficult time; even if it was my own fault. Regardless of the situation, I know that I have friends that I can count on to be there for me.
What does this have to do with God? Well, I believe that God set our minds up to function in a friendship mode. I’m not talking followers on Twitter or Friends of Facebook, rather I am talking about close people we can journey through life with as Jesus did with Peter, John, and James.
People that we can turn to in times of need, celebrate with in times of triumph, weep with in times of sorrow, or just be with in times of loneliness. Whether extrovert or introvert, we need people beside us.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 talks about the value of friendship. It starts with, “Two are better than one…” and ends with, “A three cord strand is not easily broken.” Our friendships can be a place to encounter God in ways that we otherwise could not on our own. Thomas Aquinas wrote that “There is nothing on this earth more to be prized than true friendship.” God works in our relationships, all of our relationships, but we can specifically encounter God, and further understand the love of Christ through our friendships.
Friendships can also reveal to us, things we do not see about ourselves; our strengths and our weaknesses. I will confess to you that hearing a close friend give me a compliment means so much more than receiving one from a stranger. And likewise, I put more weight in the critiques of my close friends than those of mere acquaintances. You see, God uses these confidants in our life to grow us, make us better, and ultimately point us back to Christ. That is a gift we can never repay. That is a virtue we can never take for granted. I want to challenge you today to do two things: one, tell your friends your thankful for them, and two, affirm something you see in them.